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May 16, 2008
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      Free Bible Email > Testimonies > IF SUICIDE IS MY ONLY OPTION, SO GOD HELP ME.

 

Testimony

Message Date
IF SUICIDE IS MY ONLY OPTION, SO GOD HELP ME.
J. Wadsworth
Apr 16 2008

Dear Fellow,

I am requesting a prayer from anyone who would read my cries and agonies. I am a 24 year old trying to be a entrepreneur. I started a small business here in Dubai UAE. The nature takes its course and here I am lying in my own room, broke. No work, no office, expired business license, fully bankrupt with approximately 65,000 $ debt. I tried to pull in my strength I have and from people around me but they have given up on me maybe because they cannot help and their only source of money is me. I tried to work things out but there are some things left unavoidable. People around me tend to give their high expectations from me and I don’t want to fail them, I stood with all the confidence I have and all the strengths I can show to them... And guess what.... I fail. I just fail. Now they are all gone, no friends, no relationship, and I think even family would hate me for what I am now.

Fiends, the people I owe has given me 48 hours to 72 hours starting today for them to be paid. And honestly speaking I am trying to find ways to end this all.

SUICIDE.

I have countless ask God's help and he answer me with a big NO. I asked him if I am worthy with all of these then it's fine but it's been 2 years now and all is the same. I can't clear my mind with what night be a better thing to do. I I fear answering my cell phone as it turns out people say insulting words like I can't keep my promise.... I am a liar (about not keeping the due date)... I am irresponsible... they scream the hell out of everything, because I owe them and they feel that they have the right to kill me this way.

If God don't want to listen to me, please help me pray to him because I am nearly losing it....

Reply Date
hope
sgt geiter
May 14 2008

sir i tell you no do not think about suicide belive me it is only a temporary answer i was and still am in a battle with it but i have godly people whom care and belive it makes a difference I WANT YOU TO KNOW GOD REALLY DOES LOVE YOU i fouind out at a chapel service one morning and when you know this all i can say is that there is nothing that can separate from his love.

IF SUICIDE IS MY ONLY OPTION, SO GOD HELP ME.
Jonah Wadsworth
May 06 2008

Dear Fellows!

Linda, Michelle... and all...

Thank you for a wonderful time you have given me by just reading your thoughts and prayers of concern from me. I would have come with you to a park or something to meditate and pray or just merely listen to humming birds as if I do not have any burdens at all. For an update, my OFFICE rent money has not arrived yet that is including in the total amount of what I need.

It's just 2500$ but the landlord came in and sue me straight to the police. Oh my heaven! People there are so brutal (I am in middle east, mind me sayign that) Brutal or not I still feel the fear I have not felt my whole life. This is my first encounter with the police but the good thing though is they let me out and gave me 6 days to come up with 2500$. That is just one of the problems. Remember, I still have like 50,000$ more to take care of and I can't find the words now to describe hoe brave I become while reading all your messages. I still have time and God will be right always besides me.

65,000$ - God is more than that!

Please keep on sending your messages and prayers....

Your friend in need,
J. Wadsworth

Please read this
Michelle from Durant Oklahoma
Apr 25 2008

Suicide is the Devils ultimate goal for us. Money ,money,money. Wonder why its the root of evilhuh? Well you have seen what it does havent you? My friend if you were here I would give you a big ol hug and take a nice ride out by the beautiful lake and park and just talk and pray . We would have no money in our pockets.No worries. Only peace with God and everything beautiful.Clear your mind from all this MAN MADE PROBLEMS The mans ink on paper money is nothing you should want to kill yourself over. Come on now. Just tell them to sue you. They may or may not. However they cant squeeze blood from a tomatoe right. Ok, please just change your number.Relocate.Start new and you are too young to take on so much financial responsibility right now. You will be successful one day.Now is not your time. Weve all failed.Jesus took 33 years to tell everyone about Gods grace. Look what all he had to endure. Im sure a few phone calls would have been so much easier for Jesus than that hot metal sword going thru his side. You need to go th church and get involved with people who put God first . Try it please. dont commit suicide. Ive felt like it so many times when I was junkie my kids were taken away, I lived in a shed. It can be so much worse my friend.You have failed -for now. Find strength in God,pray,relentlessly.God will bless you one day.Hes real busy too ya know.Remember that okay.Patience.Im praying for you...................I promise.~Michelle

IF SUICIDE IS MY ONLY OPTION, SO GOD HELP ME.
Mr Jonah Wadsworth
Apr 20 2008

Dear Fellow,

It is so overwhelming that though I body is too tired from work, all your words kept on reviving my spirit. I have read that God uses physical form for Him to deliver his message and so He did.

I am reposting my thoughts to the "PRAYER" link as instructed to me by our good friend, Linda. And I promise to keep an update on how everything has been working on me.

Your friend in need,

Jonah Wadsworth

God's Word.
Michael.
Apr 19 2008

"When a man's ways pleases the Lord, He causes even his enemies to be at peace with him." God can change these circumstances that ou're in, it takes your communion and fervant prayer to him, detailing all that you're up against, and how you got there. Honesty is the best policy, be as David was in prayer to God with openness and integrity of heart. God already knows your situation, you have to have the faith to relinquish all anxieties of your situation over to him. He is responsible for our problems once we allow him to take comolete control of them in trust, and not in fear. The government is on his shoulders, and we can cast any and all of our cares on him, no matter how difficult or seemingly impossible. When we are weak, he is made strong, he can change hearts of bitterness, into hearts of cpmpassion and understanding and forgiveness. Lord, we pray that you forgive Mr Wadsorth of his debt, as we forgive our debtors. We ask that he put all those things that are cast aside for you to handle behind him, and press toward the mark, for the gift of the high calling. We ask that you take away the spirit of anxiety and fear from him, and bless him with a spirit of calm and peace that surpasses all understanding. Go to the word brother, and don't come up for fresh air, until God moves on your behalf. Fast and pray for a season, with heartfelt fervant prayer for an expected end, plans of God to help you, and not to hurt. So Lord, I pray that you've lead me to say what you would have him to do, and how to go about doing it, for you are the way, the truth, and the life. And no man comes to the father, except they go through the son. Ask Jesus to intercede to the father on your behalf for deliverance from this trial. This I pray in Jesus' name *AMEN*

Continued prayer for Mr. Wadsworth
LS in Indiana
Apr 19 2008

Greetings Mr. Wadsworth. I am still holding you up in prayer. I pray this very evening you will know that HE is right there beside you. Going through this very tough time WITH you. I pray you will have funds to eat, eating and rest is very inportant in taking care of yourself. If you don't please find a shelter or food kitchen that can help you. You will conitnue being in our prayers, and I praise the Lord that you are having a new thought pattern.
Father God, I continue to lift up Mr. Wadsworth and all his needs. Father God, in this darkest hour of his life, I thank YOU that he is crying out to YOU. Father God, lift his burden I pray in Jesus name ... amen

praise God!!!
linda
Apr 19 2008

Something really wierd happened to me the morning before I read your post. I got up an hour earlier than usual, felt a need to check posts on this site! There was your post, under 'testimonies', which I don't check nearly as often as I do under 'prayer', which I check every day. Your post was so desperate I left a post under 'prayer', saying you needed prayer and to please go to 'testimonies' and pray for you....nobody knew you were posting under 'testimonies'. Please click on to 'prayer' so prayer parteners will see your post daily. Thank You Father for Your prompting me to see this desperate cry so we could all add our faith to help out. And Jesus replying, said to them "have faith in God CONSTANTLY, TRULY I say to you, WHOEVER says to this mountain(problem) be lifted up and thrown into the sea, and does NOT DOUBT IN HIS HEART, but BELIEVES what he says will take place, it will be done for him. FOR THIS REASON, I AM TELLING YOU, WHATEVER YOU ASK FOR IN PRAYER, BELIEVE, TRUST AND BE CONFIDENT THAT IT IS GRANTED, AND YOU WILL GET IT! Mark 11:22-24. Go on to read about forgivness and prayer. Also, Jeramiah 1:12 Then said the Lord to me, "You have seen well, for I am alert and active, watching over my word to perform it". I stood on these promises when I had a brain tumor the size of an orange!!! I can't say it wasn't/isn't a LONG journey!!! But here I am! Still hanging on to His promises for a full recovery! Just remember to trust in Him, if He brought you to it, He'll bring you through it. JESUS IS LORD. AMEN&AMEN.

IF SUICIDE IS MY ONLY OPTION, SO GOD HELP ME.
J. Wadsworth
Apr 19 2008

Dear Fellow,

Thanks and you don't know how much it means to me hearing there are some people though a stranger, they show their sympathy and care. I withhold any thoughts in me of killing myself because I found answers in your short prayers and advices. Honestly, today is my last day to make some money and I am trying hard to come up with it. My heart is so heavy that i forget to eat and I nearly can't sleep. Believe me, friends in God, I don't want to lose it but still, the silver line in the clouds is hardly been seen. I hope, our dear God will listen to me and will listen to your prayers too. I will hang on and from my deepest thoughts, I thank you people. God has not cleared me the way yet but It is a gift from him that I have known there are people like you who cares.

I am so alone right now and it is so big of a deal hearing you. Please help me more to lift my troubles all to God. And help me pray for all the people who despise me because of money. God knows, I never meant to be delayed. Who wanted a liability anyway?

65,000$ - God is more than that.

Your friend in need,
J. Wadsworth

please read this,,I also been is a bad strom with struggles
freddie frances
Apr 17 2008

It's akin to the testimony of Job, who said, “Though he slay me, yet I will trust him” (Job 13:15); the testimony of Joseph, who looked at his brothers, who had betrayed him, and said, “What you meant for evil, God meant for good” (Genesis 50:20); the testimony of the prophet Habakkuk, who surveyed his corrupt and crumbling nation and declared, “Although the fig tree shall not blossom, neither shall fruit be in the vines; the labour of the olive shall fail, and the fields shall yield no meat; the flock shall be cut off from the fold, and there shall be no herd in the stalls: Yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will joy in the God of my salvation” (Habakkuk 3:17).

The truth is that life isn't fair. You know it. I know it. Things happen that knock us off of our feet. But we have a God who promises to lead us by the hand, to wrap his arms around us, and to work out our life for His glory.

Mr. Wadsworth - prayer on your behalf
LS in Indiana
Apr 16 2008

Most High Father God, I understand how difficult it is for Mr. Wadsworth to cry out to you, but he has requested on his behalf that we bring his needs before you today. Father God, you know his heart, as he lies in his room, I pray that he will seek you with his whole heart. I pray that it would be instilled in him, that taking the life you have given him, is not the way out, but that knowing you are there beside him will bring him peace, as well as a plan to have a desire to go on living. I bind the enemy that is telling him different. I bind the enemy is Jesus name and by the shed blood of Jesus. I pray for Mr. Wadsworth to know his self worth in you dear Father. In Jesus name ... amen


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